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Couldn' think of a good title. I am breatrhing a little better, but it is still just as bad or worse thqn before surgery. I have no energy. The hardest part is attitude - I can feel something pulling me down into depression. I am resisting it.

I finally learned the official word for having no sense of smell - anosmia.
I am an ANOSMIAC. I love it - it sounds like maniac.

I asked the surgeon if there was any anatomical reason why I had no sense of smell. He said that he could see no injury, etc. Congenital Anosmia is typically caused by a virus - more then one can do it - even the common cold.

My Doctor said that even if the sensory patch existed now, there would be so little airflow into that region that I wouldn't smell much anyway.

The Suegeon added that a sense of smell is something that developes after you are born. The metabolical environment for that development is over. Even if I had the sensors and airflow could get to them, my brain would not form the initial pathways that allows us to distinguish between smells. It would not be like a blind man suddenly being able to see later in life.

Nose Down

I am in a weird state. When I saw the surgeon 2 days ago, I was still on pain pills, so I had someone drive me to the appointment. I was alert, and was getting enough air to almost feel normal.

I wanted to be able to drive yesterday, so I only use the pain pills at night. I was able to drive fine.

Airflow blockage has really increased. It takes me a long time to fall alseep. I think I am afraid to sleep. I was up several times last night doing nasal rinses. Today, airflow is much worse than before the surgery - if this continues, there is no way I am going to work next week. I am having a hard time holding a thought in my head.

Dr. Rohn and I laughed about how sensitive the nose is after surgery. Just a slight bump on the tip of the nose and there was pain. He said this would continue for weeks. Today, when I pres on the end of my nose, there is hardly any pain, and I haven't taken Vicodin since last night when I went to bed.

But there is also almost no airflow, even after a rinse - and the improvement from rinsing doesn't last long.

I am glad Emily is not here - I wouldn't want her to see me like this I am barely functional. I plan to get as much sleep as possible today.

New Nose is Good Nose

I saw the surgeon today - things are going well. I am stuffy today, but very little pain. I am going to stop taking the happy pills so I can drive again.

He says I will go through ups and downs in congestion and blockage in air flow, but it will be getting better each day for the next month. I will see him again on the July 8th.

I saw this in Discover Magazaine, may 2009 issue, article "The Biocentric Universe" by Robert Lanza and Bob Berman.

When particles are created as a pair, for instance, two electrons in a single atom that move or spin together, physicists call them entangled. Due to their intimate connection, entangled particles share a wave function. When we measure one particle, and thus collapse its wave function (due to the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle), the other particle's wave function collapses, too.

If one photon is observed to have a verticle polarization (it's waves all moving in one plane)
the act of observation causes the other to instantly go from an indefinite probability wave
to an actual photon of the opposite. horizontal polarity - even if the two photons have since
moved far from each other.

In 1997, University of Geneva Physicist Nicolas Gisin sent two entangled photons zooming along optical fibers until they were 7 miles apart. One photon then hit a two-way mirror, where it had a choice: either bounce off or go through. Detectors recorded what it randomly did. But whatever action it took, its entangled twin aways performed the complementary action. The communication between the two happened at least 10,000 times faster then the speed of light. it seems quantum news travels instantaneoulsy....Since then other researchers have duplicated Risin's work

THAT IS SOOO COOOOOOL

and yes, I am on drugs

No Bed Rest

Dr. Rohn said I should sleep propped up for the firwt few days. I tried sleeping at night in the bed th last 2 days - wake up with terrible head pain. Until this is over, I am sleeping in the chair.

I find if I sip cold water and press it against my 2 front teeth, that realy helps with the swelling.

When I sleep soundly, I really sweat.

It hurts to wear eye glasses - I just took them off.
The CPAP mask and the wyw glass leave a blue mark over the brindge of my nose.
I have relaly loosened the straps on the CPAP face mask

Swelling is eraching my ears.
fever gone back up into the 99s

Need to shop and get more pills today

Nose Surgery day 3

I miscalculated and am using distilled water much faster then I thought, so a firend is bringin me 2 gallons today. I am rinsing my nose very often and also using it in the CPAP machine, to help keep the tissue moist.

The bleeding has pretty much stopped, but the swelling has really getting bad. They gave me some happy pills (Vicodine), which were fine for the last 2 days, but not quite enough today. But using ice has really helped alot.

I did not sleep well last night and feel drained today.

Fever peaked Friday night at 99.9, but now is back centered about 98.6.

I have downloaded a copy of Firefly, and really enjoying watching it again.

Church Names

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

then there was a separation, those members who did not migrate to Salt Lake City formed their own Church:
The Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

which is quite a mouthful, so they changed it to:

The Community of Christ

which sounds somewhat generic - perhaps mosre like the names of other Christian Churches.
so I thought - let's rename the LDS Church to fit in more with the other Chirstians, something like:

Saint Mormon's Restored Gospel Church

Time

I felt better today when I woke up. Saturday I was stumbling around, like I used to before I was using CPAP to assit my breathing at night. My feet were not cold, though, so still better then 3 years ago.

I have realized tonight that the reason I keep staying up late is because I am afraid to go to sleep, that I won't wake up again. It is frustrating and scary to not get enough air.

I remember the first time i really noticed it. I was at work in San Ramon, CA. My office was on the 3rd floor. One day I took the stairs. I was so winded by the time I got to my floor - just 2 flights of stairs. I remember thinkning - this isn't right, why is this happening. I had n0o answer.

I took Emily to go see the new Star Trek movie - it was good. They did some clever plot twists that leave room for a lot of sequels.

I bought a Laz-y-boy char today, to use when I am recuperating from surgery. It is a backup plan, in case I am unable to breathe well while lying on my back. For the first 2 weeks, I won't be able to breathe through my nose very much, perhaps not at all. I have noticed that when I sleep in the car, with my chair tilted at 45 degrees, that is when air passes thru the easiest.

Weird Dream

I juat woke up from a weird dream. I was in a different apartment, and my late wife Karen was still alive. I was preparing to leave for the day. There were a plate of treats on a counter next to the door. They looked like strawberries and whipped cream in a hot dog bun, but the bread was thicker and had a yellow tint to it. I took one, and Karen gave me an "Oh. Brother" look, like saying: I don't think you should do that - you are trying to be healthy.

As I started to leave through the door, I decided to morve a fern from inside the house to outside the house, The fern was in a pot, and was 5 feet tall, and a bit skinny, like a corn stalk. So I was going through the door backwards, dragging this fern with one hand, and holding a pastry in the other. I would tug on the fern with my left hand, and try not to squeeze on the pastry in my other hand. We had a covered entry way on the porch. It wsa raining very hard outside, but I was under the awning, so I stayed dry.

All of a sudden, the fern turned into foam rubber, It didn't look like a lant anymore. it looked like a 5 foot tall, 3 feet wide, 3 inch think sheet of foam rubber. I turned to look at the pastry in my right hand - it had turned into as piece of foam rubber too, with pink stains on the edges. I was cunfused sabout the plant transformation, but upset about the change in the pastry. I realy wanted to eat it, and I felt deprived.

I went back inside, leaving the big sheet of foam rubber on the porch. I lifted up the foam pastry in my right hand, but said nothing. She said: Tough Luck, you can't have another one. I was disapponted because there were a few more on the plate. I noticed some strawberry chucnks that had fallen out of the bun onto the rug as I left earlier. Karen nodded as if to say - ok, you can eat that. So I knelt down and scooped them up and nibbled on them.

Then I looked at my fight foot. My shoe was gone, and had been replaced with cloth and some kind of binding cord. There were multiple layers of cloth. The outside was almost completely covered in binding cord in a tight spiral pattern. I started to unravel it. I was very upset. Karen asked me why I was so upset. I said because I had no idea how this happened. I did not know where my shoe was. What made me the most upset was that this was the second time it happened, where I come home, and my right shoe has been replaced with something of inferior design and materials.

Dernit

I slept 12 hours - so I am back where I started on the sleep cycle. I should have gone to bed at 6 PM lsat light.

My Feet Look Like Balloons

I have had insomnia pretty bad for weeks now. I am usually awake until 3 or 4 AM. I've tried everything else, so this Friday - I just didn't go to bed. I have been awake for 22 hours now. If I go to sleep now, I can wake up at 6AM after 9 hours of sleep. I want to get back on schedule.

The rumor is that the strike will start Monday. This is a single source rumor - someone saw a cryptic entry on a computer calendar of one fo the Union Reps for Monday the 4th. It could just be a ruse - both sides do that to each other.

I have been sitting down for most of the day. My feet are really puffed up. Not swollen or sore, but definititely bloated. I might wear compression socks tomorrow.

I watched 4 episodes that made up the whole on a historical documentary on the MEdici family of Italy and their influence in the renascience. The episodes are posted on YouTube. It was really well done.